Nice with my niece

Someday my niece and I are going to Nice.


We'll start at the beach, on the French Riviera


Then we'll turn and admire the town


Eat a nice baguette or a pastry by the seawall


While we look at our map


On the street we'll buy some fleurs


On our way to the Opera House


Where we'll enter


Proceed to our seats


Admire the chandelier


Enjoy the performance


Afterwards we'll stop at a little cafe


Drink a cappucino & hot chocolate


Go back to our hotel


And go to bed

Bon soir. Quel bon jour, ma petite. Quelle belle ville. Quelle belle vie.

what I'm reading this week

My Life In The Russian Theatre
by Nemirovich-Danchenko

cameron & the girls

In Her Shoes, with Toni Collette & Cameron Diaz

I love these actors & Shirley MacLaine. Can't wait till Friday when it opens.

NO WORK TONIGHT!!!! I don't have to come in early tomorrow!!!!

What shall I do to celebrate.

it is by embracing all of who we are

It is by embracing all of who we are that we earn the freedom to choose what we do in this world.

-- Debbie Ford

moment of beauty

Good food

A couple days ago I walked into a Pasta & Co, thinking it was Starbucks.



They have a big deli counter, and a lot of appetizers. Fancy stuff. No additives. Delicious. Expensive. Worth it.





I bought fruit crispbread, a spreadable cheese, and olive paste.

the poem of "cracking all over the place"

call up your armies --
mercenary men of strength and
heart, warm witch women

let their singing be
the noise you most long to hear --
sing till you shatter

all the beauty you
desire is here -- slake yourself,
grin dripping, howl

we must be whole to
thrive -- redemption enters sideways
it's all connected

from my garden comes
the calm for class, the will at
work, dreamt Italy

i am cracking all over the place

Yesterday I taught Scenes for Non-Actors. I was very different from last time I taught. I was different at work today too. I'm good at work, I realized. Work is easy. I was surprised to find myself different in class. I was stunned to find myself different at work.

I directed Shakespeare, Euripides, Chekhov early, the biggest plays I could see, because some part of me knew I was not long for scripted texts; that they would pour through me and be gone.

Now I wonder if theatre itself may be like those texts. I don't want this to be true. Perhaps the form will mutate, not vanish. I feel myself, like some tectonic plate, lifting skyward.

I dreamt I had received the entire Stanislavski System

Last night I dreamt I had downloaded the whole Stanislavski System. It came in a rush, like a salmon, mysteriously intact. I had the entire massive file.



Stanislavski was there. We were all inside the computer, in the datastream. He was a tiny glowy golden figure like the Princess Leia holograph in Star Wars. Nemirovich-Danchenko & Leonid were glowy figures to the left, out of sight.

I also, I realized, had absorbed the entire mountain of what Rumer Godden knew -- monks & monasteries, cool-wind Kashmir, sparrow children.



I was climbing down from the top of that mountain, roped with a pickaxe. The mountain looked like a giant thangka, like Jiang's white-faced Empress who hangs in my front room. I was climbing near her blue eye & her black one.


Jiang's Empress

==============

In my waking life, I am slowly typing into another blog the entire manuscript of Leonid's unpublished first book, In Admiration of the Human Being.

I am rereading Nemirovich-Danchenko's My Life In The Russian Theatre. The part about how he and Stanislavski met; and had an 18-hour conversation that began in a restaurant, moved to Stanislavski's country home, lasted all night, and ended with them founding the Moscow Art Theatre which changed acting forever.


Nemirovich-Danchenko & Stanislavksi at the Moscow Art Theatre

He spoke about how apt he thought the Russian proverb was, Two bears won't get along together in the same den -- especially given two men used to absolute rule; how they created an artificial division of duties to get themselves past this -- Stanislavski had the final word on form ("Art"), Nemirovich-Danchenko on content ("Literature"); how this never really worked, although they always obeyed it -- yet how, indeed, they did manage to create the theatre.

It is precisely this point which was to become the most explosive in our future mutual relations...

None the less, on that remarkable morning we snatched at this artificial device, so intensely did we desire to banish all hindrances, so endlessly attractive, so tremendous and precious seemed that visionary edifice which we had adorned inwardly and outwardly, infecting each other from two-o-clock of the previous day with our temperaments, beautiful dreams, and closeness to realization. Each of us honestly and without calculation was ready to take upon his own shoulders the sacrifical burden of making the concession, if only to keep the divine conflagration in us from being forthwith extinguished.

Sometimes such trifles are recalled, such seemingly insignificant trifles!

For the whole of life there has remained in my memory the silence before the dawn in the farmhouse, upon my return from Moscow.

-- Vladimir Nemirovich-Danchenko

I am also reading Christopher Alexander, the humanist architect & creator of pattern languages, author of The Nature of Order, on how real human structures grow.

An organically-grown human structure

In the carpenter’s workshop, each piece is gradually built and fitted, over many years, until each tool fits just where it belongs, and each surface is just the right size and height for the carpenters work. [...]



There is no perfect layout process, and no perfect theory of layout, which you can use to get the perfect working environment. The carpenter's workshop, referred to above, is the end product of years and years of gradual, painstaking adaptation. During these years, the carpenter works, each day, and every now and then he does something usually something small, and quickly done to make the work more comfortable.



Thus, the great comfort that is achieved is not arrived at by being right. It is arrived at by being wrong, and by making small modest steps, to make what is wrong slightly more comfortable, slightly less wrong.

It is important to recognize that the state of mind in which the carpenter is able to achieve this, is a very humble one. He is never trying very hard to make perfect environment for himself. He is never under the illusion that he can reach anything perfect. He just keeps trying to make it little bit better all the time.

This process of gradually trying to make things little bit better, all the time, is the only state of mind in which you can really get there, because it is low stakes, humble and fairly easy. You don't have to try to hard, you don't have to kid yourself or anyone else you just have to keep working at it, bit by bit, and having a few small ideas which slowly make things better. [...]

As you will see, this easy process requires a very particular set of tools, to let you get there. [...] We shall see that the tools that are needed for this process are surprisingly sophisticated.

-- Christopher Alexander

========

My question is:

How do I grow something organically? Which is in service to god? With another person?

The answer I am receiving is:

With a leap of faith. Despite all common sense. Starting from yourself, making things a little bit better all the time. With humbleness. You know how.

what I do for a living

I make games for Microsoft's Casual Games group.

I started out designing card, board, & spinner games -- traditional ones, made of paper & metal. Then I moved to videogames when I joined MS. I have made kids' adventure games for the PC; strategy, basketball, & ice hockey games for the Xbox; and now casual games for online & download.

This is our site.


MSN Casual Games

These are some of the games we make. Most of these are free, you can just go and play. I played a lot on this site when I was unemployed.


Bejeweled 2


Catan Online


FlipWords


Hearts


Hexic


Solitaire

Unlike the rest of my blog, all images in this post DO belong to Microsoft. :)

I'm always showing & talking about my theatre life. Thought I'd give my software side a little light of day as well.

apply to perform in Eugenio Barba's ur-Hamlet in Italy & Denmark

If accepted, you commit to 40 days of:

- daily physical training
- attending all rehearsals & performances
- supporting yourself in Italy & Denmark 7/10 - 8/16/06

This 40-day seminar is free of charge for those accepted. Your only responsibility is your own expenses, and impeccable commitment.

Full details & application form here. Spread the word.

=======================================
40-day seminar with Eugenio Barba

From the 10th of July 2006 until the 16th of August 2006
(dates to be confirmed by December 2005) there is the
possibility to work with Eugenio Barba and a large,
international ensemble on the performance Ur-Hamlet.

Ur-Hamlet is based on Saxo Grammaticus’ version of the Hamlet
myth, written down around the year 1200 in his Gesta Danorum,
which was the source for Shakespeare’s Hamlet. The performance
Ur-Hamlet is directed by Eugenio Barba and includes actors and
musicians from Odin Teatret, Akira Matsui from Japan, a
33-person Balinese gambuh ensemble and musicians from
Brazil and India. Furthermore, a group of about 35 actors
from a preparatory seminar will participate in the
performance.

For those interested in participating in the seminar
and in the performance:

During the first 10 days of the seminar the work
will consist of rehearsals of the Ur-Hamlet as well
as daily training.

During the second part of the seminar the activity
will include travel and performances in Italy and
Denmark, as well as rehearsals to adapt Ur-Hamlet
to new venues.

The seminar is free of charge, but participants need to
commit themselves for the entire period from 10th of July
to 16th of August. They should arrive in Ravenna, Italy, on
the 9th of July 2006. Participants are responsible for their
own travel, food and lodging arrangements and expenses.

Odin apprentices

Karin, Mia, Magnus

Hey, check it out! The Odin apprentices I worked with have a website, showcasing the work they are creating with Else Marie Laukvik.

Inside the Skeleton of the Whale

Inside The Skeleton of the Whale, by Odin Teatret

Isn't that beautiful?

This photo is from a new book, Gli Spettacoli di Odino: La storia di Eugenio Barba e dell'Odin Teatret, by Franco Perelli & long-time photographer of the Odin, Tony d'Urso.

The Skeleton of the Whale is performed for an intimate number of spectators seated at two long tables. There are olives, bread, and wine for the spectators.


The deliberately narrow performance space


Eugenio Barba pouring wine for each spectator


The piece in performance

These black & white photos are from the Odin website.

locomotive, Lohengrin

Work is massive. I am a locomotive. I feel powerful, strong. I am hauling a lot of mass uphill toward that moment of lighter, easier momentum.

I work, I sleep, I work, I sleep. I work more than I sleep. I only see daylight on the way in. Sometimes it's two or three days between seeing my housemate -- and he's home fulltime with his surgery recovery.

My game designer doesn't even say hello anymore. "Yeah," he says, picking up the phone.

Creating games gives me the same tickly feeling as theatre, in our utter seriousness about playful things. It's like walking through the Seattle Opera rehearsal halls, and seeing the black box as big as a piano case, with white stencilled letters: "LOHENGRIN'S SWAN." Inside that crate IS Lohengrin's Swan -- all 8 feet of carefully built and sewn construction & feathers & mechanics that allow it to "float" around the stage.

There is an opera company in Toronto which rents entire suites of costumes. This is their main business. Operas around the world rent from them. Mounting Cosi Fan Tutti?? No problem; they've got complete costumes for the entire cast & chorus, all you have to do is alterations (and alter back).

Some opera companies build their sets to be rentable. They are designed from the beginning to come apart into shippable-size pieces. We did an entire Don Giovanni on a set from San Francisco, in costumes from Toronto.

I'm talking about opera because I can't talk about my games. But trust me, the details are as strangely logical, and nourishing.

we know our season of aliveness

A tip from my life-coaching teacher:

- Substantial life change takes 6 to 9 months.
- Most people tend to start projects or changes in January.
- But research shows that projects or changes begun in September are far more likely to succeed.

We're tired after the holidays, so January is hard. And we're used to starting things in September, when school starts.

I like that -- just by picking WHEN to start a project, I can improve my odds of success dramatically.

I personally believe there are other factors as well.

We know our season of aliveness. Jeff and Kris, for example, awaken with the sun. Their energy soars in the summer, falls off steeply as days shorten. Jeff cleans our kitchen in summer, I clean it in winter. In October & November I can do anything. I feel smarter by the DAY right now. Work is going so much better, just because it's colder. I am so much more alive now than a month ago.

I am a Flower Moon by birth. I am a Hunter's Moon by temperament.

storm moon, fasting moon, weaning moon, snow moon

JANUARY - Nursing Moon, Milk Moon, Wolf Moon
angel blessings, care of the soul, sacred time with self
1/25 - full moon

FEBRUARY - Storm Moon, Fasting Moon, Weaning Moon, Snow Moon
honoring silence, prayer for strength, rest
2/8 new moon, 2/23 full moon

MARCH - Seed Moon, Chaste Moon
faith, new beginnings, take a risk
3/10 new moon, 3/25 full moon

APRIL - Mating Moon, Hare Moon
attracting love, from the heart, sexual delight
4/8 - new moon, 4/24 full moon

MAY - Dyad Moon, Journey Moon, Flower Moon
life purpose, love, embrace imperfection
5/8 new moon, 5/23 full moon

JUNE - Mother's Moon, Mead Moon, Strawberry Moon
abundance, trust, I trust
6/6 new moon, 6/21 full moon

JULY - Father's Moon, Wort Moon, Buck Moon
be bodacious, have courage, follow your dreams
7/6 new moon, 7/21 full moon

AUGUST - Nesting Moon, Barley Moon, Sturgeon Moon
prayer for children, protection, wisdom
8/4 new moon, 8/19 full moon

SEPTEMBER - Harvest Moon, Wine Moon
I am, goodbye, prosperity
9/3 new moon, 9/17 full moon

OCTOBER - Hunter's Moon, Blood Moon, Sorting Moon, Culling Moon
clarity, I choose, surrender
10/3 - new moon, 10/17 full moon

NOVEMBER - Beaver Moon, Death Moon
grief, magic, shadow work
11/1 new moon, 11/15 full moon

DECEMBER - Oak Moon, Birth Moon, Cold Moon
comfort, prayer for hope, rebirth
12/1 new moon, 12/15 full moon, 12/30 new moon

Pale Moon doth rain
Red Moon doth blow
White Moon doth neither rain nor snow
Clear Moon, frost soon

Cycle of life.

Nursing Moon
Weaning Moon
Chaste Moon
Mating Moon
Flower Moon
Mother's Moon
Father's Moon
Nesting Moon
Harvest Moon
Culling Moon
Death Moon
Birth Moon

Fruits of the field.

Milk Moon
Snow Moon
Seed Moon
Hare Moon
Flower Moon
Strawberry Moon
Buck Moon
Barley Moon
Wine Moon
Blood Moon
Beaver Moon
Oak Moon

All the truths at once.

storm moon, fasting moon,
weaning moon, snow moon -- bare feet on
pine floor, purring, tea

harvest moon, wine moon,
the bridge across the Danube --
suddenly set free

more ocean